Karen C.L. Anderson is a storyteller who believes that the truth
never creates suffering and that all stories can be told through
the lens of truth. She is also a feminist, a writer, speaker,
workshop presenter, and blogger who consciously chooses to live her
life as an experiment and to view the world through the lens of
curiosity and fascination. Her previous book, The Peaceful
Daughter’s Guide to Separating From A Difficult Mother, is an
international best seller, having sold well over 100,000 copies. In
another life, Anderson spent 20 years trying to fit her
right-brained self into a left-brained career as a trade magazine
journalist in the field of plastics (and if she had a dime for
every time someone mentioned that line from The Graduate…). She is
married to a left-brained engineer and they live in Southeastern
Connecticut.
Eric Maisel, PhD, is the author of more than fifty books
including Why Smart People Hurt, Fearless
Creating, Mastering Creative Anxiety, and The Van Gogh
Blues. Widely regarded as America’s foremost creativity coach, he
is a former psychotherapist, active creativity coach, and critical
psychology advocate. Dr. Maisel writes the “Rethinking Mental
Health” blog for Psychology Today, lectures nationally and
internationally, and provides keynotes for organizations like the
International Society for Ethical Psychology and Psychiatry and the
American Mental Health Counselors Association.
Dr. Maisel facilitates workshops in locations like Paris, London,
New York, Dublin, Prague, and Rome, has provided hundreds of print,
radio, and television interviews, and has taught tens of thousands
of students through his classes with DailyOM. He can be found at
www.ericmaisel.com and www.kirism.com and can be reached at
ericmaisel@hotmail.com.
“Through the power of story, You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing
Generational Trauma & Shame speaks directly to the parts of our
minds that most need to hear these messages. While our rational
selves are busy learning the steps we can follow to unshame
ourselves, our more tender parts get to experience what it feels
like to be loved as we are.”
—Simona Vivi H, founder of The Center for Remothering and of
reMothering.org “In You Are Not Your Mother, author Karen C.L.
Anderson unpacks the tricky territory of shame and how it can color
your whole life and hold you back, unless you face it head on.
Childhood can be a minefield of hurt, trauma, and shame both at
school and at home with difficult parents. Anderson's revelatory
courage in sharing her healing journey is inspiring and offers a
roadmap to both mental health and the joy that comes from
reclaiming your own life.”
—Becca Anderson, author of Badass Affirmations “This is the book
every daughter with a difficult mother needs. It is a wise,
compassionate guide to liberating yourself from the stories your
mother told you about who you are.
“Part poetry, part memoir, part savvy self-help book, Karen
combines stories about the deep pain she has experienced in her
relationship with her mother with simple tools you can use to help
you dismantle and release the emotional grip a lifetime of being
shamed creates in your heart and mind.
“If you have had a difficult relationship with your mother, you
will recognize the feelings of internalized shame Karen so
powerfully illustrates with the stories she shares, and you will
know once and for all that you are not alone and that having
complicated feelings about your mother is okay. “Karen is the wise
voice you want whispering in your ear when shame knocks on your
door, reminding you that you are so much more than your
relationship with your mother.”
—Maggie Reyes, master certified marriage coach & bestselling author
of The Questions for Couples Journal “Powerful. Liberating. Soul
food. This book is a journey of transgenerational healing and
self-love. Beautifully written, it will awaken parts of your soul
that you didn’t know were dormant.
“For anyone that has lived with shame, or feels like they lost
themselves as a result of being in a dysfunctional relationship,
this book will make you feel seen and understood and open doors to
freedom and healing. It includes easy-to-follow, powerful exercises
that will leave you wondering how you ever coped without them!
Karen shows us how to release ourselves from the shackles of shame
and step into the beauty and strength of our true
selves—unashamedly and with deep self-love.
“Thank you, Karen, for showing me how to love myself again and
reignite my inner spark.”
—Yasmin Kerkez, co-founder of Family Support Resources “Both
unflinching and compassionate, You Are Not Your Mother offers an
unconventional perspective on how shame is passed down through our
maternal lineage, and how women and those socialized as women can
manage the often debilitating mind/body experience that is
shame.”
—Kara Loewentheil, author of the upcoming book Take Back Your
Break “If you talk mean to yourself, if you let the opinions
of others govern your decisions, if you allow cultural expectations
and your own history and judgments of others to impact your view of
yourself…don’t let this book go until you finish it. This book
feels like a life-affirming conversation with a trusted friend, the
one that you know will tell you the truth, no matter how difficult
AND beautiful it is.
“In the first part, I had to remind myself to breathe. The
experiences were difficult because I recognized myself in so many
of them.
“Through succinct, staccato style, I gather mighty threads that
help me attach elements of shame and toss the whole mess in the
trash. I can’t guess how many times I will give this book to people
who are on their way to hack their own path to live without
shame.
“And. Let me tell you how delightful it feels to say, ‘I am not my
mother.’ ”
—Mary Anne Em Radmacher, author/artist “This book invites you to be
aware. You need that awareness as much as a conductor needs a
score. Without that score, the orchestra will play poorly and we
will not get music. Without awareness, you will repeat your
pratfalls, retain your pain, never feel quite right, and, history
tell us, harm the next generation. If you are not to be your
mother, best open your eyes. This book is a gentle eye-opener.”
—Eric Maisel, bestselling author of Why Smart People Hurt and
Redesign Your Mind “In her powerful new book, bestselling
author and certified coach Karen C.L. Anderson offers readers an
empowering yet practical plan of action to transform shame. Filled
with reflective writing topics, mindset reboots, and meditative
practices, the book lends hope to anyone struggling in their
relationship with a maternal family member. Not only does Anderson
share the techniques she has used in her decades of coaching, she
pulls back the veil to reveal the difficult and fruitful work she
did with her own narcissistic mother to overcome toxic habits,
release her shame, and move into open-hearted acceptance. Bonus: it
reads like poetry.”
—Nita Sweeney, bestselling author of Depression Hates a Moving
Target “Karen C.L. Anderson does an amazing job at taking the
reader through the raw, vulnerable, and authentic parts of our
human nature in You Are Not Your Mother. Through her vulnerability,
I was able to see myself and not feel alone. The reader gets a
clear snapshot of what generational shame looks like, how it's
passed down, and what can be done about it. I found so much value
in gaining awareness of the messages that are playing in my own
head and the guideposts showing me how to create a new relationship
with shame. This is a book that I would recommend to any mother or
daughter.”
—Rachael Wolff, podcaster, speaker and author of Letters from a
Better Me “This book has a felt-sense all on its own. From page
one, I witnessed the tender waves of my own shame emerge—raw and
exposed—but then gently held and nurtured in a new way, as the love
infused into each page began to soothe & shift the wounds of a
lifetime. Karen’s writing is a beautiful blend of incredibly
relatable personal experience and integrative body-based healing
practices that will guide you to fall in love with the deeply human
pieces of yourself, over and over again.”
—Samantha Johnson, trauma-centered somatic coach & founder of The
Alchemy of Truth “Anderson conducts a highly personal exploration
of generational trauma and healing, particularly between mothers
and daughters, and provides a compassionate approach to a sensitive
topic that helps guide readers through what is an emotionally
wrenching book. Her depictions of abuse, while not overly graphic,
are still painful to read—which make them all the more necessary to
air out in the open... With a unique blend of past memories and
present struggles, conveyed in a mix of poetry and prose, this
text, the author freely acknowledges, is not a clinical or
scholarly look at the topic of female generational trauma. Instead,
this book is for those who wish to be guided by someone who has
experienced what they have experienced—someone to walk them through
what has worked for her. A large part of what works for Anderson is
recognizing the difficulties and ordeals that her own mother and
grandmother went through. The traumas they experienced perpetuated
the feelings of shame that they then handed down to the author—the
exact same process that has occurred with so many women over
countless generations: ‘The shame was so pervasive we couldn’t see
it…it’s the water we have been swimming in for…ever. And it wasn’t
ours.’ Anderson’s honesty and dedication to plumbing the depths of
her own life provide advice and guidance for anyone who finds
themselves in similar circumstances. While the subject matter
itself may be heavy, the author’s empathy and kindness (both to her
readers and herself) make this an important companion for those
looking to escape from generational trauma.”
—Kirkus Reviews “Karen C.L. Anderson begins her compassionate book
so that we can safely recognize shaming through her—in a timeline
of her life experiences in prose poetry, rhythmically punctuating
the emotional beats of shock, hurt, freeze, erasure, and
breakdown.
“As we further read, think, absorb, and realize the shame within us
in stages of understanding, bringing us home to Self, Karen follows
our thought processes and centers us in a conceptual framework with
the tenderness of an embrace.
“It is in the practices that the brave-hearted work begins, as
Karen guides us in many ways to express and objectify our shame
through creative, interactive, multisensory activities that move
our experiences outward. These lively, improvisational practices
delight and challenge since we are free to select, develop, and
share their transformative power.
“When we emerge from this deep journey of self-knowing in a reverse
timeline with positive, life-affirming reflections of Karen’s
experiences, we will have made the choice of worthiness,
self-acceptance, and self-love, realizing that we are not perfect,
but simply human.”
—Kate Farrell, author of Story Power: Secrets to Creating,
Crafting, and Telling Memorable Stories
 |
Ask a Question About this Product More... |
|
