Prologue: How I Got Stalled
Introduction: The Stepping Stones to Independence
Step 1. Assess the Young Adult’s Skills for Independence: The
Executive in the Brain
Step 2. Build a Foundation for Moving Forward: Motivation,
Readiness, Respect, and Support
Step 3. Identify a Realistic Direction: The Young Adult’s Interests
and Aptitudes
Step 4. Plan How to Help--and Where Not To: Parents’ Executive
Skills and Respect for Boundaries
Step 5. Set a Goal: Pull Everything Together and Evaluate Goodness
of Fit
Step 6. Make It Official: Use SMART Goals to Plan the Steps and
Evaluate Progress
Step 7. Make It Easier: Anticipate Problems and Intervene to Get
Things Done
Step 8. Get Creative to Tackle Specific Weaknesses
Step 9. Seek Extra Help If You’re Still Stalled
Step 10. Learn from Your Success
Epilogue
Appendix: Getting Help with Independent Living
Resources
Richard Guare, PhD, BCBA-D, is a neuropsychologist and
board-certified behavior analyst who frequently consults to schools
and agencies on attention and executive skills difficulties. He is
former Director of the Center for Learning and Attention Disorders
at Seacoast Mental Health Center in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. Dr.
Guare is coauthor of bestselling books for general readers,
including Smart but Scattered, Smart but Scattered Teens, Smart but
Scattered--and Stalled (with a focus on emerging adults), and The
Smart but Scattered Guide to Success (with a focus on adults). He
is also coauthor of The Work-Smart Academic Planner, Revised
Edition, and books for professionals including Executive Skills in
Children and Adolescents, Third Edition.
Colin Guare, BCBA, LBA, is a Rhode Island-based behavior analyst
and executive skills coach. He has worked with children,
adolescents, and young adults since 2008 in clinical, home, and
school settings, and consults for organizations and state agencies
on employment coaching programs.
Peg Dawson, EdD, is a psychologist who provides professional
development training on executive skills for schools and
organizations nationally and internationally. She was previously on
the staff of the Center for Learning and Attention Disorders at
Seacoast Mental Health Center in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. Dr.
Dawson is a past president of the New Hampshire Association of
School Psychologists, the National Association of School
Psychologists (NASP), and the International School Psychology
Association, and a recipient of the Lifetime Achievement Award from
NASP. She is coauthor of bestselling books for general readers,
including Smart but Scattered, Smart but Scattered Teens, Smart but
Scattered--and Stalled (with a focus on emerging adults), and The
Smart but Scattered Guide to Success (with a focus on adults). Dr.
Dawson is also coauthor of The Work-Smart Academic Planner, Revised
Edition, and books for professionals including Executive Skills in
Children and Adolescents, Third Edition.
"The Smart but Scattered books are among the most useful and
informative resources for managing executive skills problems. This
one is chock-full of sound advice for young adults--including those
who have ADHD--and their parents."--Russell A. Barkley, PhD, ABPP,
ABCN, author of Taking Charge of ADHD
"As a mother of three, I think this book should be in the home of
all parents of older teens and young adults in today's world. It
defines the stages of independence that should be taking place as
our children grow up mentally and emotionally. It also clarifies
the difference between being 'lazy' and not being ready--and helps
young adults (and their parents!) build the future they
want."--Andrea M., Rye, New Hampshire
"This book will help you and your young adult get to know
yourselves (and each other) better--and develop a plan to get
'unstuck.' Using your strengths and past successes, you can set
goals and get the support you need to achieve them. I highly
recommend this book for any parents and grown kids who need some
practical help getting where they want to go!"--Patricia O. Quinn,
MD, coauthor of Ready for Take-Off and On Your Own
"I often find parenting books unrealistic, but this one, written by
a father and son, is helpful and practical. It gives a step-by-step
plan for helping a stalled young adult move forward, and the
questionnaires take some of the emotion out of sensitive
conversations. Colin's story sounds so familiar to me as a
parent--as does his dad's! This book shows how to help your young
adult work toward goals that he or she chooses, while moving your
relationship toward one of mutual respect between
equals."--Patricia J., Rockaway Beach, Oregon
"A superb resource for parents who want to help young adult
children develop the executive skills they need to reach their
educational and career potential. No other book provides such a
clear explanation of 'failure to launch' and converts scientific
knowledge into practical problem-solving ideas. I can’t praise this
book enough--it’s truly a gold mine of knowledge and tools for
families."--Mary V. Solanto, PhD, Department of Pediatrics and
Department of Psychiatry, Zucker School of Medicine at
Hofstra/Northwell
"This unique, useful resource will help young adults successfully
launch from the comfortable nest of the family home to a nest of
their own."--Lisa L. Weyandt, PhD, Department of Psychology,
University of Rhode Island -
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