Susan Weitzman, Ph.D., is an institute lecturer at the University of Chicago's School of Social Service Administration. A practicing psychotherapist in Chicago, she lectures and conducts workshops nationally.
Chicago's affluent North Shore provides 20-year veteran psychotherapist Weitzman with abundant evidence of the secret lives of "upscale domestic abusers" and their victim-wives. Shattering the cultural myth that emotional and physical violence in the home is confined to couples of a lower socioeconomic class, the author presents vivid case histories that are often excluded from clinical studies and statistics. Lacking a frame of reference for domestic violence in this echelon, health-care professionals ignore the signs, while law enforcement agents and judges go easy on it, she contends. Few believe or sympathize with a well-dressed, bejeweled woman if she finds the courage and self-respect to speak out against her successful, respected, powerful and often charming husband, while battered women's shelters turn her away, assuming that she has many other resources. But according to Weitzman, she doesn't. While often well educated and successful, the "upscale abused woman" is typically ignorant of her legal rights, convinced by her abuser that she is responsible for his behavior and isolated by her denial and shame from validating voices and potential assistance. Weitzman's upscale abuser exhibits Narcissistic Personality Disorder, feels eminently entitled and is incapable of seeing his wife as a person in her own right. Weitzman provides excellent practical advice for these women to make choices that extricate them from abuse, and proposes a new language and better education regarding "upscale violence" for the professionals who are likely to see it in their work. (Nov.) Copyright 2000 Cahners Business Information.
"Weitzman provides excellent practical advice for these women to
make choices that extricate them from abuse, and proposes a new
language and better education regarding 'upscale violence' for the
professionals who are likely to see it in their work."
"Written in a voice that is both compassionate and uncompromising, 'Not to People Like Us' is sure to become the definitive work on the topic of upscale domestic abuse."--Marcia Clark
"This brave and powerful book marks the coming of age of our understanding of one of the most devastating social problems of our time. Written with rare compassion, this groundbreaking book will help the woman trapped in a corrosive relationship to think clearly and act bravely."--Dr. Judith Sills, author of Excess Baggage and Biting the Apple
"'Spouse abuse, ' 'battered wife syndrome, ' 'domestic violence'--these familiar, featureless phrases roll off our tongues as if they were not really woman-torture, the most brutal treatment men can inflict on their partners, and thus on children. So inconceivable is the idea of violence in our finest households that it's hard even to imagine well-educated, successful men slapping, punching, biting, kicking, scalding, stabbing, and psychologically terrorizing their 'beloved' partners. And because these same men wield the power in our culture, it is no surprise that theirs is the commonest, yet least reported, crime in the nation. In this compelling, groundbreaking book, Dr. Susan Weitzman investigates this hate crime against women 'just like us'-and carefully shows us all the way back to safety and self-esteem."--Dalma Heyn, author of Marriage Shock and The Erotic Silence of the American Wife
"This is a book that will change the current thinking on domestic abuse, and begin to equip social workers, psychologists and the courts to deal with this devastating problem more effectively. There is hope behind the poignant and desperate case histories Weitzman presents-this book itself is evidence of it. By ensuring that class concerns no longer obscure our recognition of violence against women, Weitzman has benefited women everywhere."--Sarah Buel
"Dr. Weitzman's years of service to diverse populations of abused women shines through in this compelling study. Honest and hard-hitting without sensationalizing, the stories of hidden abuse and the paralyzing fear of victims is gripping, clearly portrayed and poignant. Most important, Dr. Weitzman has identified what it takes to break the cycles of abuse."--Joseph A. Walsh, Ph.D., Dean and Professor, Loyola University Chicago, School of Social Work