Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD, is a psychologist who treats adults in both individual and couple therapy. She writes the blog Making Change for Psychology Today, and previously served at Somerset Medical Center in Somerville, NJ as director of women's psychological services and chief of psychology in the department of psychiatry. She lives with her husband and two sons in Basking Ridge, NJ. Find out more about her at www.drbecker-phelps.com.
"Drawing on the latest scientific research but written in an
entertaining and accessible manner, this book will help you
understand why you're insecure in your relationships. It will also
help you heal, so that you can have healthier relationships with
others, and perhaps more importantly, with yourself."
--Kristin Neff, PhD, author of Self-Compassion and associate
professor of human development and culture at the University of
Texas
"If you're single, you'll discover how to choose a partner who is
truly available for a connected, supportive, nurturing
relationship--someone who accepts and loves you for you. If you're
in a relationship, you will gain insight into your partner's
behavior and motivation and discover how to create a loving
connection in which you both feel truly valued and cared for.
"Filled with relevant, real-life examples and powerful exercises,
Insecure in Love will help you leave your self-criticism and
sabotaging behaviors behind and develop true self-compassion. No
matter how much you've struggled in the past, you will finally
understand how to create happy, healthy relationships and
experience true, lasting love."
--Mali Apple and Joe Dunn, authors of The Soulmate Experience: A
Practical Guide to Creating Extraordinary Relationships
"Motivated by her professional interest in humans and attachment
theory, Dr. Becker-Phelps has developed a solid resource for men
and women to improve their lives and their relationships. Insecure
in Love is a clear and comprehensive guide for self-understanding
and self-compassion in which readers are encouraged to explore
themselves and complete step-by-step exercises. The end result will
be greater understanding of your relationships and a healthier,
more secure self!"
--Kathryn Cortese, MSW, LCSW, ACSW, co-owner and president of
G�rze-Salucore Eating Disorders Resource Catalogue
"It is rare that an author can take such a deep and meaningful
subject and present it in a helpful, caring, and hopeful manner.
Those who are suffering from anxiety disorders that have undermined
past relationships will find her suggestions and exercises easy to
understand and potentially very successful."
--Randi Gunther, PhD, author of Relationship Saboteurs
"Insecure in Love is engaging, practical, and comprehensive all at
the same time. It takes the latest theories of love and provides a
useful roadmap for why couples struggle to maintain closeness.
Becker-Phelps gets to the heart of the challenge and describes what
individuals need to address about themselves, as well as what
couples can work on together, in order to recreate a meaningful
connection between two people."
--Daniel Goldberg, PhD, director at the New Jersey Couples Training
Program in the Center for Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis of New
Jersey
"Insecure in Love provides a step-by-step guide for overcoming the
psychological hurdles that prevent so many people from finding and
creating lasting and satisfying relationships. Becker-Phelps
provides easy-to-use assessment tools and exercises that will help
readers identify faulty ways of thinking and behaving, understand
their childhood context, increase their self-compassion, and form
loving and secure attachments going forward."
--Guy Winch, PhD, author of Emotional First Aid and The Squeaky
Wheel
"A wonderfully readable synthesis of attachment theory,
mindfulness, and cutting-edge approaches to developing
self-awareness. This is illustrated throughout with practical
advice and vivid stories told by a wise and caring therapist, who
is a recognized expert on cultivating successful
relationships."
--Diane Handlin, PhD, founder and executive director of the
Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Center, NJ
"I've always been fascinated by attachment theory, which does a
wonderful job of explaining how pivotal early events color all of
life. Leslie Becker-Phelps helps us understand how 'anxious
attachment' plays itself out in our current relationships--and what
we do can to heal from that substantial early wound. Highly
recommended!"
--Eric Maisel, PhD, author of Rethinking Depression and The Van
Gogh Blues
"Leslie Becker-Phelps explains how early attachments can create
obstacles to healthy and secure connections in adult romantic
relationships. Insecure in Love provides the self-knowledge and the
tools necessary to overcome these obstacles and get you closer to
feeling secure, happy, and loved in your relationships. Highly
recommended for anyone who feels anxious and insecure in a
relationship."
--Michelle Skeen, PsyD, author of The Critical Partner and host of
Relationships 2.0 on KCAA 1050-AM
"This is a wonderfully user-friendly handbook on healthy relating,
both with others and with ourselves. Leslie Becker-Phelps mentors
us in such a clear--and encouraging--way. She shows us how we can
open ourselves to others while tending our own boundaries so that
real love can happen."
--David Richo, author of How to Be an Adult in Love
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